ATTENTION:

It is official that all classes will be combined into one state tournament at a single site. Where is this site you may ask? Well look no further than my living room in Manhattan. We can fit one mat, so the tournament should only take a few weeks. Also due to limited room for spectators, a lottery will be held to decide on which 20 people will get to watch. Coaches, there probably won't be enough room for you guys in the corner, so you'll have to shout directions to your wrestlers from the front yard.

Maybe you're not an ugly human, but a good looking ape.....with exceptional verbal skills.